My family and I went to the sea, but it happened that I caught a cold. And the whole vacation for me was not as pleasant as I wanted. Near our hotel there was a wonderful beach with a sloping entrance to the sea, a bar and sun loungers.
But my wife wanted to visit another, wild beach, because there, according to the locals, there are many coral reefs with wonderful fish. I did not want to go there, because the road to this beach takes 15 minutes under the scorching sun! And there is no infrastructure, and it is so long to go to the hotel!
We came to the place and my wife was delighted. She even found me a place in the shade under the trees. Indeed, the view was magical, but, due to lack of comfort and poor health, I did not show enthusiasm. And the more I compared this beach with the previous one, the more my mood deteriorated.
With every minute and smile on her face, I wanted to complain and ask more and more:
“Why couldn’t we just go to our old place?”.
And then I remembered the simple words that have repeatedly saved my relationship:
Don’t agree, but accept.
This is a governance principle that allows for healthy discussion and objections during the decision-making process, but requires the parties to fully support the decision made earlier.
“This phrase saves a lot of time. If, despite the lack of consensus, you are sure about something, say: “Look, I know we have different views on this issue, but let’s take a chance. Just agree with me, but you can keep your opinion”.
A person who thinks in a similar way demonstrates his emotional intelligence to the world.
By following this slogan, you will make your life and the lives of others easier. For example, I could have continued my whining to my wife, which would have made the situation much worse, but nothing would have changed, because we had already come to this beach.
So I did exactly the opposite. I looked for all its advantages in the new beach and emphasized them to my wife: “Honey, the water is just wonderful. We have never seen so many fish in our lives. And the view is really stunning! “.
“I know,” she enthusiastically said, “Isn’t it wonderful?
Seeing the happy faces of my wife and children, I calmed down and we had a great time.
Don’t agree, but accept.
This expression can also save your life. After all, your health directly depends on the relationship with your loved ones.
Taking care of your own body is very important, but working on relationships is also a form of self-care.”
So, in order to be healthy and happy – establish relationships with your loved ones. And these 4 words will help you with this. In moments when compromise is impossible, but you do not want to start a quarrel, ask yourself: “Can I accept this without disagreeing?”. If so, show your partner your willingness to do so, and he will reciprocate.
On my own example, I was convinced how effective this way of thinking is.
