She’s 40 years old. Her children are already grown up. She and her husband are on the verge of divorce. And she wants a little baby! Even then, about 10 years ago, her mother told her that by the time she was 40 she would want a baby, but did she believe it? When she was young, she wanted freedom, she was only glad to dump her daughters on someone and go for a walk with her husband. But her grandmother didn’t baby-sit.
And then everything was turned upside down. The eldest daughter left, started building a career, and didn’t think about children at all yet.
– Mom, I’m not gonna waste my youth on diapers. You can’t expect grandchildren from me for ten years yet, – Maria said.
The youngest son crossed the line of adolescence. If he used to reach for mom, demanding her attention, but now more often closed the door to his room with a key. So Helena suffered from the lack of children’s love. The loneliness was suffocating her.
She asked her husband to give birth to a baby. He didn’t really want to babysit again, but he didn’t try to stop her. Two or three months later she saw the cherished two lines on the test.
Helena’s happiness knew no bounds. It was as if her most cherished dream had come true. However, the rest of the family was not happy about the addition. Mom reproached, the kids were not happy, and other relatives were turning their heads. My husband listened to everyone and also began to give back:
– Now what are we? Are we tied up again? It must have been a mistake. Again these diapers, diapers, nights without sleep. And the age we are already … You and I just exhaled, began to live for themselves, and you wanted a baby.
– I wanted a baby? – Helena was surprised.
– I mean, we’re together.
My daughter started saying that she wouldn’t even come home now. Why didn’t they consult me? Helena believed that parents had the right to decide for themselves whether to have a child or not. The woman hoped only that the baby would be born and everyone would change their attitude toward him.
She went alone to the first ultrasound. She was uncomfortable among young married couples who were anxiously waiting to meet their baby for the first time.
– The baby froze. Regression,” the ultrasound technician answered dryly.
All the relatives fell silent. No one had expected such an ending. Helena didn’t know what to do. When she underwent purging, she felt devastated. She knew there was a reason – no one wanted a baby. The gynecologist claimed it was God’s way of getting rid of a sick baby, but Helena didn’t want to believe it.
Two years passed. Helena and her husband bought a summer house. They traveled around the world. But deep in her heart Helena still dreamed of a miracle. When she saw other people’s children, she began to cry. Yes, of course, she understood that she would no longer be able to give birth, because she had no one to support her. Her husband had fallen out of love with her long ago, he was just afraid to admit it.
She forgave everyone, but continues to want as ardently for a child, which is sure never to be. Alas.
